Happy Father's Day!

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY to all the Dad's in our Live from the Inside Out™ community!

On Father's Day, as I think my Dad, I have thought about the many life lessons he has taught me. I shared a number of those lessons with him as a thank you. I thought I would share some of them with you too in case what my Dad has taught me may bless you too.  Here are:

10 life lessons I’ve learned from my Dad

1. God is always there for you.

  • My Dad's faith has carried him through his life, from losing his Dad at the age of 7 through many other life trials. He has always leaned into God and trusted all would be well, in time.  He would tell me the same but it was hard to believe until I started to lean into God and trust him myself. God is always there for us, we need to lean in and trust in Him, and His timing.

2. Take care of your loved ones.

  • I grew up with my Nane, my Dad's Mom, living with us. Taking care of your loved ones wasn't just something my Dad talked about, I saw he truly believed it when he lived it out by having his Mom live with us, and later in life had my other Grandparents move in with him and my Mom.  Being willing to care for our loved ones is a gift, not only for those who are being cared for, but for our hearts as well.

3. It's who you are and what you do with what you have that matters.

  • My Dad wasn't raised with much but that never stopped him from going after what he wanted, from a strong family to a successful career. He used his God-given gifts and showed me that it's not our circumstances that define us but our choice of attitude and character that will determine our direction in life. May we remember we are children of God, let's tap into the gifts He's given us and use them wisely.

4. Never say you can't.

  • My Dad loved to read and listen to inspirational authors and speakers. One time he had me listen to one speaker who talked about how the word 'can't' inhibits us from succeeding in life, and how our mindset matters. After listening to that with my Dad, he said I wasn't allowed to say the word "can't." I find myself saying the same thing to my kids these days, which I am sure drives them nuts like I felt when my Dad told me that. But now on the other side, I trust some day my kids will appreciate this lesson like I do. May we trust we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:13).

5. Hard work and perseverance pay off.

  • My Dad has a strong work ethic. From a young age he knew things weren't going to be just handed to him and that he was going to have to work and persevere to get what he wanted and where he wanted to go in life. A recent example of this is how he woke up one morning in retirement having had a dream. He wrote down all the details from the dream and then realized it was a book. He has now published two books and is working on his third. If you like historical fiction books, check out his books HERE.  May we also be willing to work hard and persevere when God puts something on our hearts.

6. Family meetings and to-do lists are beneficial.

  • I grew up with my Dad insisting I have a steno pad and that I write down my to-do list for the day to help organize my mind. He and my mom also held family meetings. As a kid both of these tasks seemed like unnecessary things to do. Yet now as an adult, I continue to write down my to-do list daily and we have weekly family meetings in now thanks to my Dad's example.  May we recognize some things we are taught by our parents, or God, may not make sense that day, but may in time.

7. Build others up.

  • Whether it was playing basketball, going for my degrees in school, writing or speaking, my Dad has always encouraged me. He's never told me I couldn't do something I was passionate about and has been one of my top cheerleaders in life, along with my Mom. His encouragement has made me want to do the same for my loved ones, and others. May we also be willing to use our words to build others up into who God made them to be.

8. Be willing to speak hard truths when needed.

  • My Dad was that person who would tell me the things I didn't want to hear, but needed to. He set firm boundaries yet I see now how the hard truth he spoke was the refiners fire and helped me become who I am.  All he said was out of love, and to draw out the potential he saw in me.  May we be willing to speak hard truths to others as well.

9. Show up for others. 

  • My Dad had just arrived in Alabama to visit his sister when I called and shared with him and my mom my diagnosis. Without hesitation, he and my Mom turned the car right around and came to be by our side. May we see the difference between where we want to be and where we need to be and be willing to show up where we need to be.

10. Serve others.

  • Many times in life I have watched my Dad serve others for no reason other than it was what he believed he was supposed to do. From helping a gentleman at church who had special needs to serving food at a local homeless shelter, I have watched my Dad treat people with dignity and respect no matter their circumstances.  May he inspire us all to do the same and serve others with joyful hearts, expecting nothing in return.

*Bonus* A good hug lasts long after you've let go.  

  • My Dad gives the best hugs and I get my love of hugging from him. I realized when my parents moved out of town how much I appreciate his company, and hugs. I may not get his hugs as often as I use to but I always treasure them when I do, and know his love will always be with me, no matter how close or far apart we are. May we treasure the gift of time with our loved ones and let the love they give be captured in our hearts, and souls.

 

Thank you to my Dad, Stephen, my father-in-law, and all the Dads out there who are loving your families well and for the wise lessons you are passing along to your children. May God bless you and your role as a Dad!

With gratitude and respect,
Shawn
 

Start children off on the way they should go,

and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

- Proverbs 22:6

The Gift of Stillness and Silence

Recently I took Matt fishing at out favorite spot in town. I love to stand back and watch Matt. As he sat in stillness and silence, I thought about how that is so hard for so many of us to do that these days. Being content in stillness and silence are beneficial life skills. In order to grow stronger in them, we need to put them into practice. With all that is calling our attention, taking time to be still and silent may not be a priority.

Yet it's never in the busyness, the rushing around, the craziness of doing that gives us clarity, perspective, and peace. It is in the stillness, the silence, the quiet, the calm where we create enough margin to grow these qualities within.

As many of us wrap up the school year, and all of us step towards summer, may we take time to...

pause. breathe. pray.™

May we make a point of scheduling time in our day, and our week, to be still and silent with God. May this time with God help us grow content in stillness and silence and be a time of rest and renewal for our hearts, minds and souls. May this time in stillness and silence help us gain clarity and perspective for our days. And may we, like Matt, experience rest in our souls by being, instead of doing.

With love and hope,

Shawn

He makes me lie down in green pastures,

he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. -Psalm 23:2-3

We Can Start Over Whenever We Choose

One night a couple of weeks ago I had to take one of my kids to the ER. Thankfully all was well though we didn’t get to bed that night until 3 am. The next day I was just off from the lack of sleep. I am a creature of habit and my morning routine helps me fuel up so I am able to be more outward facing throughout my day. Well, that morning I slept a little later than normal which made me missed part of my morning routine. I tried to go about my day but I was off. I thought, “well, I will just write today off and start fresh tomorrow.”  

Do you ever think that too?

I feel like I can do that to myself when I am off, just think I will press reset the next day, or if it’s close to the weekend, I decide I will reset on Monday.

Can you relate?

That day though I chose something different. I chose to press reset that day. I prayed and asked God to renew my thoughts and perspective and to help me not right off that day.  That afternoon I decided to go through my morning routine to help me get back on track, which includes my prayer and meditation time, a workout and a nourishing meal. It was interesting to me to see that I was able to reset my mind that afternoon and that I didn’t have to wait until the next day, or the following Monday.

I share this with you in case you too can have off days and can write off the day you are in, like I can.  I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.™

Sometimes we will need a day to just be off. Let’s give ourselves grace and space for those days. Yet, may we consider that every moment is an opportunity for us to start over, whether it be with our daily routine, or something else we need to begin again. May we invite God into the conversation in our minds, and trust that He will equip us with what we need to begin again and help us through, refreshing our souls, from the inside out.

With love and hope,
Shawn

 

 

“Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!”

- Isaiah 43:18-19

God Is Our Guiding Light

If you live in New England, you’ve experience what we have here in Connecticut this past week, with the wave of smoke coming through from the Canadian fires. 

Though the smoke distrupted our week, with end of the year school activities and sports getting cancelled due to poor air quality, life continued on as normal otherwise.

One day last week Gavin showed me a picture of NYC and there was a blanket of orange over the city due to the smoke from the fires. I not only saw the cloudy, orange haze that covered the city but I also saw that the sunlight had made its way through the thick air, still providing light for the people walking along the streets.

When I saw this, it made me see that even through the thick smoke, the sun was still shining, providing a guiding light to the people in the city. This made me pause as sometimes in life it can feel like a thick cloud is lingering over me, and right now is one of those times for me. Yet even when there is a haziness covering our days, God’s love is available for me to use as a guiding light to help me through.

I share this with you today in case you can relate to experiencing these hazy days, weeks, or seasons we can go through. I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.™

Like the sun was able to break through the thick, hazy smoke in the city last week, may we trust that God and His Word are that strong light in our lives. Through the thoughts, or circumstances, that cloud our minds or lives, God is able to shine light through the thick haze. May we draw close to God and His Word so they can be a lamp to our feet and a light to our path; like the sun was to the people in the city last week.

With love and hope,

Shawn 

Your word is a lamp to my feet, and a light to my path. - Psalm 119:105

Your Presence is A Gift In Itself

today is a special day....it's Gavin's 16th birthday!!! When I think about Gavin, I think about the calm, witty, thoughtful, Mets loving teen I get to call my son. I am so grateful for Gavin in my life as he has taught me many things, such as going slower in life and being patient are blessings, and being present is a gift in itself.

You see, 6 years ago I wasn't sure I was going to be present to share in Gavin's 10th birthday celebration. I was scheduled for treatment that day and a gracious person, Chris, offered to switch his treatment time with me so I could get home to surprise Gavin. And surprised he was!  His reaction was so sweet, and being there to celebrate him was so special.

Above is an old picture that holds that memory for me that I will always treasure.

In this world where there are so many things we can give one another, sometimes we think coming empty handed to one another isn't enough. Yet there is a real gift given, and received, when we can arrive in front of someone empty handed, with nothing but ourselves, and when we are welcomed as we are. 

I share this today to celebrate Gavin's special day, and to invite you to join me to...

pause. breathe. pray.™ 

Giving physical gifts is thoughtful and fun, trust me, Gavin opened some this morning. Yet may we remember that being present for, and with, one another is a real gift we can give one another, whether it is on each other's birthday, or any ordinary day of the week.  There is something real beautiful when we can arrive, and accept one another, with empty hands, and open hearts, like Gavin showed me on his 10th birthday.

With love and hope,

Shawn

P.S. If you'd say a prayer over Gavin, and his new year, which will include getting his license, I'd sincerely appreciate it!

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above... -Jame 1:17

A Day to Remember and Give Thanks

This is a home we pass every year on our walk to the Memorial parade in town.

One day a person made a choice to enter a profession where they chose to serve others.

When they made this choice they chose the mentality of “you over me.”

These men and women put the interest of others before their own.

They woke up and chose to put themselves as the barrier between harm and safety to protect others.

They lived rich lives, not that they were paid well, but they were rich in love; living life at its deepest purpose, to love others above self.

They lived simply and sometimes didn’t sleep so others, like you and I, could.

They chose to walk towards the battle, not away from it.

Some came home, others did not

Today, please join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.™

May we remember those who sacrificed their life in service to our country. We don’t know their names but God does. May we give thanks for each person who gave their life, so that you and I get to live as freely as we do today.  And may we remember, the freedom we haven’t isn’t meant to serve self, but God meant for our freedom to be use in service of others. May we be inspired by the selfless service of these men and women who gave their all, and wake up each day choosing to live with a heart of service, as they did. 

With respect and gratitude,
Shawn 

 

For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.

-Galatians 5:13

One of the Hardest Things to Practice...

Do you ever have a challenging moment, or a day, you just want to press rewind and play out what happened differently? I have, and last week I had a moment like that. 

Unfortunately in life we aren't given a rewind button or the opportunity to erase those moments. Yet what we are given is the opportunity to sit with God, and His Word, to help guide us in how to move forward from those challenging moments we experience. The one word that I come back to when I sit with God is forgiveness.

Forgiveness is healing. 

Whether we need to forgive ourselves, someone else, or both, forgiveness is a bridge to freedom for our souls. 

Forgiveness doesn't mean we have to make ourselves vulnerable to the same hurts again, nor does it give us permission to go and say/do again what we said/did that we need forgiveness for. Most importantly forgiveness helps make us right with God. It also humbles us when we ask for forgiveness, which is an important character quality to live out. Forgiveness also frees us from needing someone to ask us for it because we can give forgiveness, without being asked for it. Forgiveness frees our souls, and whether that person ever comes around to ask for forgiveness from us, or not, we no longer need what happened to negatively impact us.

As we enter this week, may we take time to...

pause. breathe. pray.™

May we pause to ask ourselves if there is anyone we need ask forgiveness from and/or anyone we need to forgive, whether they have asked us to forgive them or not. May we choose to sit with God so that we are better equipped to practice forgiveness this week. Forgiving ourselves. Forgiving others. Just as God forgave us to set us free, may we also forgive to bring freedom to our souls. 

With gratitude and love,
Shawn

 

 

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone.

Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

-Colossians 3:13

Let Your Light Shine

There is something about loss that helps me see more clearly. It cleanses the fogged lens I can look through and reminds me that I get to be here today, and that you get to be here today.

What will we do with this gift of life we have?

This week has helped me take a look in the mirror and see that I am holding back in life. I have allowed fear and doubt to take up mental space in place of faith and freedom. I have listened and believed fear and doubt’s voices, and I have sat on the sidelines in life in many ways for too long now.  

I was reminded of a moment a number of years ago when I saw two candlesticks sitting on a shelf in my dining room. They were from our wedding well over a decade before. What struck me about the candles is that I never used them. I was waiting to light them for…well, something. After I saw them sitting there on the shelf unlit after all those years, that night I lit those candles.

Why? 

Simply because I could.  And in lighting them, I was reminded that God’s word tells us that we are a light in the world.  In Matthew 5:15, we are reminded that lights are not meant to be hidden but to shine and give light to the whole house. Just like my unlit candles, sometimes we don’t live out our purpose and instead hide the light that God has put in us. Today, let’s choose to let God’s light shine bright in us and through us, through out words and actions. And like those candles, which were made to be lit, may we remember we were made on purpose with a purpose. Our purpose is to love God and love others with God.  We are called to be a light in the darkness. Let that truth be our guiding light today, which will help us snuff out the fear and doubt, and allow us to use the gift of this day to brighten our own hearts, and the hearts of others, just as my friend spent her life doing.

With gratitude and love,
Shawn

Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house.

-Matthew 5:15

Thank you, Mom

She walked around as she cradled me in her arms.

She walked behind me encouraging my first steps.

She tucked her feet beneath herself as she taught me to pray.

She has faithfully walked beside my father for over 50 years.

She lovingly walks beside my brother, sisters, and I guiding us with her love, wisdom and care.

She joyfully walks beside her grandchildren, teaching them and inspiring them with her love.

She patiently walked beside each of her students as she taught them, encouraging them in their strengths and building up their weaknesses.

She carries the burdens of those she loves yet is never weighed down by them, as she never fails to walk beside us to lift us up.

She has walked beside many through the valleys, along the plateaus and stands beside us to enjoy the hilltop views.


She is always there, if not in person in Spirit, walking beside us, loving us, and praying for us, and our steps.

Her own path hasn’t always been smooth yet her faith has always guided her through.

Her feet never tire because she walks in love.

Thank you, Mom for always walking beside me. I pray to walk in love beside others, especially my own children, as you so faithfully do.

Happy Mother's Day - to every Mom, and Mom in heart.

With gratitude and love,
Shawn

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

-Proverbs 31:25-26

The Gift of a Rainbow

On Friday morning, a beautiful soul went to heaven. Many of us in our community are mourning the loss of a sweet, faithful friend who courageously fought her battle with cancer for years. On Friday evening, our town was covered by this beautiful double rainbow. When I saw this rainbow, I couldn’t help but think of God, and our dear friend.

In the Bible, God used the rainbow as a symbol to remind Noah of His promise. The rainbow wasn’t a sign just for Noah, but was for all future generations since- including us - to be reminded of God’s faithfulness. Therefore, the rainbow serves as a reminder that God is faithful and His promises are true. Because of this, when I saw this rainbow, it meant to me that our friend was now fully healed and well, with Him.

Seeing the rainbow didn’t make the sadness of losing her go away. Yet there was a comfort that came in knowing I can trust His Word in this time, and in any time. And this rainbow gave us joy on a day where joy didn’t seem accessible, just as our selfless friend would want for us.

Even though we believe in God and His promises, it doesn’t mean we won't experience the sadness and grief we all have to go through. Yet the gift of this rainbow serves as a reminder for us to look to Him, and His promises, to help us through. This is easier said than done, as grief is heavy. But I witnessed the faith of my friend give her strength and peace to help her through the past few years, and I know she wants us to lean on Him too.

I share this with you today because the world lost a bright light this week in our community and it’s a hard loss to reconcile. I am not sure what is going on with you today, but maybe there is something you are having a hard time reconciling with too. I invite you to join me too…

pause. breathe. pray.™

May we look at this rainbow, and any rainbow we see moving forward, and be reminded that it is a gift from God and serves as a reminder of His everlasting covenant with us. No matter what we are having trouble reconciling with in our hearts and minds, may we trust in His promises to help us through, just as my dear friend did. 

And before you go, I have a favor to ask of you, please choose to live out love today in memory of sweet, loving, selfless Val, whose love shined brighter than the sun and keep her husband and two teens in your prayers. Thank you.

With love and hope,

Shawn
 

Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting

covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth.”
- Genesis 9:16